Trusting

I have recently joined an amazing organization called Bible Study Fellowship that meets weekly to study God's word. "Oh, okay, so she joined a Bible study". Not so much. I joined an incredible international organization that meets weekly at different locations across the globe to study the same message. We are split into smaller groups for discussion of the week's passage and questions before we return together for the lecture. This year we are studying the story of Moses and the Israelites and it has rocked my world in the best way possible.

We continue to hear about the Israelites' lack of trust in God and their failure to obey Him. They continued to try to take matters into their own hands despite God's instructions to trust Him. And then when He did provide for them, they spent a lot of time grumbling about it. 

Talk about a smack in the face.

Here I am grumbling and feeling sorry for myself for having to take some new, harsher medications when I should be thankful they even exist for me to take! God has shown me through various people and different conversations that this is the best path for me, so why is it still so hard to trust Him? 

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.

-Proverbs 3:5

That verse has always resonated with me. It came to me in my first year of teaching (though I'm sure I'd seen it before) and it never quite left. Every morning I prayed that and even had it posted as a reminder on my desk. In the almost five years since I started praying over that verse daily it has gotten me through some very hard times, and I know it will continue to do so. 

Trusting God is such a freeing feeling. With it comes a weight lifted and a heart lightened. Burdens are no longer so hard to bear and the waves don't seem to crash as hard. Instead of allowing myself to worry I am trusting in Him with all my heart and letting Him guide my every step.