Tuesday, January 29, 2013

A Season of Solitude

A few Sundays ago our pastor at Hope Church preached the benefits solitude has the potential to bring. This sermon spoke to me because of the season of solitude that has been forced upon me. 

I am a "doer", an action-taker in all situations. Any time a project was assigned at school I wanted to know the due date so I could begin planning how I would split it up to complete it with plenty of time to spare. I was the bossy one who insisted on doing the whole group project to ensure it was done how I thought would be right. In short, I've never been one to take well to seasons of solitude and rest.

David is quick to call me out and tell me I need to relax, and I am quick to tell him that to-do lists and a full calendar do relax me. So when a season of solitude and rest was forced on me, you can imagine how difficult it was for me to let go. It was only made possibly by others who stepped up and allowed me to take a step back.

Solitude can be just as dangerous a place as isolation, unless you are conscious about how you use that time. Our pastor warned against being one who constantly seeks that time of quiet and alone time. Someone who instead of filling their time caring for others with the occasional period of recharging instead does the opposite and rarely cares for others more than themselves.

Taking time to recharge and listen to Him was exactly what I needed, only I didn't realize I needed it so badly. I needed to take a step back and "refill my bucket" in order to pour out on others again. I'd become so focused on my job and ministries that I forgot to find Him in them. I was just going through the motions. 

While I wish it could have come in a very different way, I am thankful for this season of solitude. I have been able to journal through my emotions. I have been able to have as much time for daily prayer and meditation on the Word as I want. I have been able to step back and refocus myself where I need to be-in His way. 

I have been stilled and reminded that He is God.

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