Monday, July 15, 2013

Carry Me Now

Carry me, carry me, carry me now
From my sinking sand to Your solid ground
The only way I'm ever gonna make it out
Is if You carry me, carry me, carry me now
God carry me, carry me, carry me now
-Josh Wilson

Anyone else out there have issues admitting they need help? I often struggle to be in control and fail to ask for help. Whether that helping hand comes from my husband, a colleague, or God, more often than not I try to figure it out myself rather than seek someone else's aid. 

Last week our community group was talking through a passage in Luke when it dawned on me how rarely I ask for help and how much damage I cause in an effort to control the situation on my own. What dangerous words, on my own. I learned a few months ago how much I need God, but how quickly I forgot that when I found my footing again. As soon as I was able to stand on my own two feet again, I forgot who formed the solid ground I was standing on - God. In my effort to control all the situations around me (I am the quintessential oldest, type-A kid here) I lost track of the great one who got me there.

While my prayers continue to include peace at heart and mind, I am also adding full trust and faith in God. As devastated as I was, I never felt closer to God in those first few weeks. In my extreme weakness I realized how much I needed Him. As I've gotten stronger I've ventured away from the truth of how much I need Him. I pray that I once again place all my worries at His feet and give Him supreme control over all aspects of my life.


  1. We have been working on a similar topic in a women's book study I have been doing this summer. I think its so important to look at your heart to find your idols and not on materialistic things of the world. If I look at my greatest idol they are things of contentment such as comfort, my husband, provisions. It's so easy to not look at these things as idols but as something you have earned and worked hard for, but in reality they are most peoples greatest idols. I have been trying so hard to to recognize the Lord daily for the blessing he has given me in theses things as I haven't earned them on my own.

  2. I had the same revelation when I was diagnosed - especially in the beginning when I was told I had maybe 6 months to live. During that first CT when I was walking with Him on a white sandy road under a beautiful blue sky, I knew I was prepared for the worst news and had never felt so at peace in my whole life. It's really hard not to fall back into our "old" patterns of thinking God made me strong so I can handle it all on my own. But the rub is "God made me", and with that He is my beginning and my ending....why would I think He doesn't want to me my middle as well?